Do you get defen­sive or hos­tile when you feel like you may be being made fun of?

Yes, but unless I’m sure I either try to brush it off or just watch it a bit more. Some­times peo­ple can be brash and not even realise it. Once I know for sure they’re mak­ing fun of me I’m out of that sit­u­a­tion asap.

What was your expe­ri­ence with a Lolita get­ting this way towards you? (In or out of lolita, yourself)

Not a lolita, but a cos­player. I com­pli­mented their cos­tume and they just nod­ded and ignored me after. Kinda weird to do that see­ing as though I was the per­son they would’ve dealt with if they wanted to buy anything.

Where was this?

At a con. They looked awe­some so idk if it was just because I wasn’t cos­play­ing and just in jeans or what.

Did you shrug it off or did it kind of bother you? Why do you think?

It both­ered me a bit but I ended up shrug­ging it off. I know not every­one has com­mon decency but if you can’t han­dle the heat then get out of the kitchen. I think thats why loli­tas who com­plain and com­plain about atten­tion (neg­a­tive or pos­i­tive) irk me. You can’t get into it think­ing you’ll just blend in. Peo­ple will notice and some­times say something.

I’ve only ever had nice­ness when com­pli­ment­ing loli­tas. Even if they’re not look­ing their best I always com­pli­ment them and talk to them. It can be so dis­cour­ag­ing for new loli­tas to get only crit­i­cism.
Though I think some­times I’ve had ner­vous­ness, but thats most likely due to not tak­ing com­pli­ments well, which is some­thing you can’t hold against them.

Do you get defen sive or hos tile when you feel like you may be being made fun of?

If I feel like some­one is mak­ing fun of me, I tend to just brush it off. You can’t please every­body, and if some­one finds that mak­ing fun of other peo­ple is the only thing they can do to feel bet­ter about them self then that’s their prob­lem not mine.

What was your expe ri ence with a Lolita get ting this way towards you? (In or out of lolita, yourself)

I’ve only ever seen Loli­tas be bitchy to one another online, never in life, but even online it always seems to be the same few peo­ple, it just looks like more because they do it so often, I can under­stand how peo­ple think we’re all bitchy because of this, but thank­fully we really aren’t.

I think I answered the other two ques­tions in my answers to the first.

Shouldn’t have asked…

Do you get defen­sive or hos­tile when you feel like you may be being made fun of?
Not really, I’m used to it (I’m 15 and I look like 12 -.-)

What was your expe­ri­ence with a Lolita get­ting this way towards you? (In or out of lolita, your­self)
As if. I don’t know any­one who even sees Lolita as some­thing other than Nabokov related.

Where was this?
See pre­vi­ous question.

Did you shrug it off or did it kind of bother you? Why do you think?
Again see pre­vi­ous question.

Mmkay, Doki~n. I decided to respond for once actu­ally ON your blog. Here goes:

Do you get defen­sive or hos­tile when you feel like you may be being made fun of?

–No, gen­er­ally I try to brush it off but it always makes me feel really bad inside. =/ Very low self-esteem as it is.

What was your expe­ri­ence with a Lolita get­ting this way towards you? (In or out of lolita, yourself)

–OH THE HORROR STORIES I COULD TELL YOU. The only bad expe­ri­ences I have had around loli­tas from here was one in par­tic­u­lar. She’s an attention-craving, con­ceited, child­ish brat. If she wasn’t the cen­ter of atten­tion, she’d have a fit. I can elab­o­rate over IM if need be. (Will give one exam­ple below.)

Where was this?

–Cons, friends’ houses, just about every­where. She used to run a maid cafe. More hor­ror stories.

Did you shrug it off or did it kind of bother you? Why do you think?

–The one time both­ered me. We were at a friend’s birth­day party (she wasn’t even invited. She only knew the girl through her boyfriend) and she was sulk­ing in the cor­ner because she wasn’t receiv­ing any atten­tion, as opposed to the birth­day girl. Ugh.

That girl may well have just been annoyed that she wasn’t the only Lolita around. Some girls love being so ‘unique’ and just can’t stand the thought that any­one else might dress this way too, like it’ll steal their pub­lic thunder.

I nor­mally totally ignore bad com­ments (why should I care what some­one who buys cheap crappy qual­ity clothes or thinks a track­suit is pub­li­cally decent thinks about my fash­ion?) but I think that was actu­ally a pretty awe­some reply to the Target-bag lady. Hah, I sound like such a cloth­ing elit­ist, sorry! But now and then, peo­ple like that deserve it. Just because Loli­tas look adorable doesn’t mean that they auto­mat­i­cally have to put up with bad man­ners, because they look like they will. We’re nor­mal women in strange clothes, and we have the same right to stand up for our­selves as any­one else. Why should we have to act all defense­less and fluffy?

Okay, I don’t think act­ing defen­sive and rude is alright though. If you’re defen­sive over your clothes then your lack of con­fi­dence will surely show — and when in a fash­ion style very few peo­ple recog­nise, I myself think it’s quite impor­tant to give peo­ple a good impres­sion of it.
Whether we like it or not, we’re ambas­sadors of Lolita while wear­ing the style, and peo­ple will often judge all Loli­tas, or even all alt dressers, by how those they’ve met have acted. It’s much bet­ter to remain dig­ni­fied, calm and gra­cious, because then the pub­lic at large are that much more inclined to think of us all well if they meet more Loli­tas. Peo­ple are on the whole a bit afraid of alter­na­tive fash­ion styles, and we don’t need to per­pet­u­ate that stereotype.