(I’m really sorry if this post seems like a wall of text. :D TL;DR: I mad??.)
Lately, there has been some talk of Lolitas being bitches to others in public places. Not to just one another, but to people in general. buu_buu As an alternative fashion, Lolita gets attention from all walks of life, and in all kinds of negative and positive spectrums. We’ve all had our share of wonderful reactions that just make you smile to yourself and make you feel a little better about wearing such a “strange outfit”. We’ve also shared the bad.
However, what I don’t understand, is our reactions in return. ;288 Many of us shy away, clam up or ignore comments and compliments alike. Brushing it off because we don’t want to get into it with someone, which is fine, I suppose. Some of us are gracious and willing to either address rudeness in a calm manner and return compliments with “thank you“s and the like. The rest of us? ;378 Well, the rest of us sneer, we snarl (those ugly aghast looking faces), or we make some snide remark in return, even if there wasn’t any ill-will directed at us.
(Click for Larger. Dialogue below goes with it)
Me: Oh wow, it’s so nice to see other lolita actually out and about in these part. *hasn’t really seen others outside before* (not excited, real casual and relaxed) Your coord is lovely.
Lolita: … Thanks. (Doesn’t sound too pleased.)
Me: (here comes the stupid remark) ^^ There’s more of us, be happy~ you’re not alone.
Lolita: :| ..*just kinda nods her head and walks away without so much as a thank you*
Me to Richard: ._. Think I offended her with that last bit? I mean, I didn’t mean to sound as if I mistook her a newb if she wasn’t.
Richard: IDK. Maybe she’s just not in a good mood. -shrugs-
Again, this is not to say all Lolita have this reaction at one time or another but those that do this all the time really put a bad name to Lolita. hk_brood It makes me wonder if some times, maybe they can’t help it. They’re just not sure how else to react other than possibly defensibly, aggressively or rarely “Better-Than-You-Because-I-Spent-A-Bundle-and-Look-like-a-million-bucks“?? It feels good to wear lolita so, you can’t help to get a little defensive, or even a little hostile when someone says something about it to you. Especially, when you’re just trying to do your best to enjoy your clothes and how good they make you feel. le_sigh
Despite having had a few negative responses myself (given to others), I was kind of offended that she’d brush me off like that. ;103 Was it because I wasn’t in lolita that day? Did I sound like I possibly mistook her for a noob? ;183 After spending some time with a few more ‘mature’ (so to speak) lolitas, I’ve become more gracious of the positive reactions around me. Negative ones I brush off more often than I respond to nowadays and I feel all the better for it.
One experience I can share that was a bad reaction from me was, I was going to breakfast with Richard and we were waiting to be called since there was a long wait. So, I took him to the game store a few businesses over and I noticed a lady and her man following us from the waiting area. Brushed it off, maybe they were bored too. Something seemed off, but I left it alone. Go in, start browsing and occasionally, I heard giggling from her. I left it alone, thinking they were joking to one another, and then I heard it from across the store, “Look, heehe, she’s got a little pony bag. *progressively louder* PFFT TEEHEEE!!!” I started glaring at her and I let my mouth go, “Look, she’s got a cheap $10 bag from Target!!!!” The lady looked embarrassed and left quickly. While she shouldn’t have stalked me just to make fun, I feel as though I really overreacted to the situation.
There’s not much we can do to curb this behavior entirely but we can try to better ourselves as this behavior comes more and more to light and as lolita is worn more and more in public places by more and more girls. (not counting meets, conventions or events of any kind)
Do you get defensive or hostile when you feel like you may be being made fun of?
What was your experience with a Lolita getting this way towards you? (In or out of lolita, yourself)
Where was this?
Did you shrug it off or did it kind of bother you? Why do you think?
(You can answer these as you like and you don’t have to do any or all of them)
Why do I feel like I was just rambling because I was bothered by it? … ”orz